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Annieguile Bentulan's avatar

This sets up such an intriguing premise! I'm curious to see where the story will go from here. And yes, great flow, and the imagery really stands out.

The line : " The echoes of the vision clung to her, wrapping around her thoughts like a suffocating fog. "

Beautifully haunting, emphasizes how inescapable the nightmares are.

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Tarik James's avatar

Tgank you for reading Annieguile. I really appreciate your thoughtful comment. Parts II & III are up as well, if you're interested.

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Nikki | Nocturnal Narrator's avatar

This was GOOD. Very haunting. There's an urban legend that my sister used to tell me, and this story brought so much nostalgia but in its own unique way.

By the time I got to this part, I was in deep:

"Isotta turned, reaching out, across the bed, for his hand. As her fingers closed around it, she felt a clammy, cold moisture that was completely out of place."

Chills. Loved this!

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Tarik James's avatar

Wow! Thank you for reading Nocturnal. I like that it sparked some nostalgia. That is so cool

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